We all get Used! , is my topic on this week’s “Bleeding Heart Chronicles”. Good morning, love. This topic is near and dear to me. We’ve all been here before. Some more then others! You get used. Not just once. Multiple times. We all have our turn. If it isn’t people in general using us, it’s life. There is no hiding or avoiding it!
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Isn’t it funny how you’re in a what you believe to be a loving relationship. And your partner is maybe getting that extra training for a new job. Times are tough and there’s a strain on the relationship, but you stick with them. You go through months of rough times, supporting them financially, mentally and do everything you can to see them through. You give them money, because you believe it’s an investment in them and your future together. You’re going to get married. You are their soul mate. Together forever. You brave the rough times. And as soon as they come through and they finish their school and get that new job. And now you need them while going through a situation. Bam. They betray you! You find the strength to walk away. I wish I could say that’s where it ends. But nope. They return. They made a mistake. They love you. Just as you let your guard down for sake of love. Bam. They betray you again. Lies and cheating…. You’ve been used again. No integrity. No respect. No truth. All of the relationship was just lies. It was all a game to them. You discover your friends knew they didn’t love you. You were a means to an end. They used you up. Funny how friends wait till the end sometimes to reveal things they knew! How many times can you look back and realize that maybe, you were used by a person or life?
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It can happen in any relationship, whether it be with your boss, your partner, your friends, your church, or your family. You do favor after favor. But they are nowhere to be found when you need a helping hand. People who are users create an unbalanced, impossible feeling relationship. To make matters worse, often, We (The Used) will typically start sacrificing our own needs for someone else in order to fill a void. Then as things get worse, what do we do? We stay the course because we do not abandon anyone. We have integrity. But, staying in an impossible situation leads us to start feeling isolated from those around us. And Social isolation can lead to feelings of loneliness, fear of others, or negative self-esteem. Do you see how this can quickly start spiraling downward on you before you even know what has truly happened. You wake up one day and ask yourself. How did I get here, who is this person I’m with and what do I do now? It’s like managing your money. “If you allow people to make more withdrawals than deposits in your life. you will be out of balance and in the negative. So, know when to close the account.” For some people the more you give, the more they will take. That is just the twisted world we live in now. Notice how today things are being loved and people used? What happened to loving people and using things? You can try to hide out at your house to avoid the chaos. Stay away from everyone. But there is no place far enough to run! Two things in this world that there is no escaping. Life, and death. One of them, will always find you. The truth you seek, lies within yourself.
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All of these terrible things and situations, makes us victims. We are a victim of life, people and death. Is this how we are gonna live our life? Being a victim? How many people do you hear always cry they are a victim of something? Turn your TV on. Watch the news! Check your favorite social media. Victims aren’t we all? Listen to people talk about how life isn’t being fair. Well, raise your hand if life at some point wasn’t fair to you. That would be all of us, right? People come in and out of our lives for reasons. Good or bad, It’s no accident. You are there to give them something and they are there to give you something back. It’s life’s design. Life is using you. Sounds gloomy but it doesn’t have to be. We all have to play life’s game. But we can change the rules. I’ve made death my friend and life my enemy. Why fear death? If you’re still breathing, she isn’t your present problem. Life is. Don’t just let life happen to you. You, need to happen to life! No longer be a victim, Be the predator! Wrap your hands around life’s throat. Squeeze until you get what you’re after. Never fear Life or Death! Make them fear YOU! Life may use you. Use her back.
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If you have been used by someone. And now reflecting on it. Do not beat yourself up daily over the situation. You may be thinking, “How could I have been so stupid to ignore the warning signs!?” We all do it. And it’s ok to be upset. Now, also may be a good time to think back on past relationships and your pattern of choosing partners. Maybe a change of how we except dates needs to be rethought. Find a friend you can confide in and get everything off your chest. Cry if you must. Maybe even write a very vicious letter to the person that used you. BUT DO NOT SEND IT!! Throw it away, you’re just getting everything out so you can heal. And now, fill yourself up with ‘self-care’. Fill your schedule with activities, get reconnected socially, and foster meaning/purpose through your work, business, spirituality or volunteer commitments. Be active. seek enjoyment. When dealing with people, you can still be nice but set healthy boundaries!
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When people and life use you. Learn to put people in their place and put Life on notice. You should never be someone’s back up plan or second choice. In this day and age, if you’re too nice you get used. Too mean and you push people away. So, start out nice but if they start to use you, put your foot down on them. Happiness can still be yours. Don’t rush into anything. Take your time. Don’t worry when darkness approaches you. I stand in the darkness for you. Because I believe a single flame can burn against all darkness!! Feel the energy from my flame. I support you. I bleed with you. And Together, we can reign Holy Karma down on the heads of People who USE US!!! Lol. Because Together we are unstoppable, my love! We will master all users! Always and forever!
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˜Bleeding Heart Chronicles˜ ©
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Lord Freakzilla is a passionate and resourceful creative writer, experienced in studies of human behavior and psychology. His articles for “Bleeding Heart Chronicles “ is fueled by his compassion for the broken hearted. He also brings to the table his gothic poetry style for “Dark Rose Poems” series.
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